Sunday, January 29, 2006

Suck Will Do What Suck Wants to Do...And Coworkers...That Don't Suck.

Dear All Things That Suck,

Hey! So, uh, how's it going? With the sucking and all? I was just wondering because you haven't been around for a few days, and I wanted to say that I hope you're enjoying yourself wherever it is that you might be sucking presently. You have my express permission to stay there for a bit. Don't feel the need to return anytime soon because I'm rather enjoying myself in your absence.

Sincerely,
Zube

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The other day, my coworker was saying how sometimes he's overwhelmed with all of the estrogen in his life. Girlfriend. Girl roommates. Female coworkers. I wanted to help out, so I left him a little present on his desk. I should really market this shit:


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A while ago, I was on the elevator with another coworker.

Coworker: Hey, so do you have any sisters?

Z-Girl: Why? Because you think I'm fucking hot, and that any sisters of mine would be hot, too?

Coworker: Heh.

Z-Girl: I do, as a matter of fact, have two sisters. And they look just like me. Which means, naturally, that they're hot.

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PS- I'm like a million YEARS behind the times. I now have an AIM account. I am zubegrrl (NOTICE, two 'r's in grrl because I think My Belle is the original zubegirl). If you ever want to chat (like, hmmm, RIGHT NOW!) give me a shout out! I have to admit, I sort of stole the idea from Rich. He mentioned AIM in his blog, and I was like, "Huh, what's this shit about?" Thanks Rich.

8 Leg Humps:

junebee said...

We can package those pills with my the cat turd snacks in a buy-one-get-one free promotion.

Lisa said...

Great! I think you "all things that suck" is visiting ME this week.

Phil said...

You really shouldn't point out to All Things That Suck that they are slackin' off on the job, or that their vacation has been noticed. You're supposed to let 'em get all comfortable thinking things are going all according to their plan and let them get complacent, then pick up and move without giving them a forwarding address. See, now they know they're not doing their job properly, so will probably end up moving back in with you & inviting all their friends over, who'll be like the "friend" who "needs a place to crash for a few days" and winds up living on your couch for the next year, washing his dirty underwear in your kitchen sink & leaving half-eaten Cheetoh's all over the floor & thinks it's funny to eat an entire gallon of beans and then NOT flush.

Oh, and you better not be hooking Hoot up with any of your coworkers. I'm totally ahead of them in the line. ;)

Phil
Echoes in a Nomad's Head

Happy Villain said...

Zube is on AIM! Cool! If you're ever up late at night, you can IM me on my AIM name too: Antandre. Instant Zube... I don't know if the world is ready for that.

Chickie said...

I'll take a dozen of the pills, please.

Bonanza Jellybean said...

I'm with Chickie, but I think I might need a CASE.

Amy said...

I'm afraid I'm going to need some of those pills too. Only for my own devious purposes... *muuhuuhuuhaaa* (evil laugh)

The Roomba sounds like too much fun, have you named it yet?

mothergoosemouse said...

you might just induce me to hop on AIM for the first time in months, if only to harrass you about getting your ass down to denver in the next century or so...

and i'll give you a hint - my aim name is not mothergoosemouse

 

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