Saturday, February 18, 2006

Getting Punished With Your Pants Down

-Okay, so I totally stole this from Risible Girl who, by the way, rocks socks. Check her out. Anyway, if you're even remotely interested in gazing at my navel with me, feel free to participate. I'll gaze at your navel with you if you're so inclined to set up a Jahari dealymabob of your own. We could get together and compare lint and shit over coffee. We should probably make sure to use coffee mugs with lids, like travel mugs or something. 'Cause light lint might fly. Just a thought.

-I'm TOO excited because I'm going to North Lake Tahoe, California the first week of April. I'll get to do conferency things and hear and read the words 'ski industry' approximately 2,000 times. WHEE! The coolest part is that I've never been west of Utah before. I'm a west coast virgin, soon to be defiled. I'm looking forward to it. I bet there are lots of people in California to make fun of, too. At least I hope so.

-When I was in high school, this kid pulled down my gym shorts while I was in the midst of lifting weights. I was MORTIFIED because I had on those silky undies with the scrunched up skinny sides that no matter how big of an ass you've got to fill the suckers out they still manage to poof beyond the filler. They were black with big pink roses on them. I remember them well. So does everyone else in my gym class, probably.

I was hugely embarrassed, and with weights in my hand it took painful seconds to resume a position optimal for the pulling up of the gym shorts.

The gym teacher was not amused. She had an ICY COLD STARE that could silence a 6' 3" senior linebacker. And she was like, 4' 10". She pulled out her handy dandy icy eyeballs, and the laughter ceased. So did the weight lifting. She had ten minutes of class left to exact her punishment. And that punishment was fucking beautiful. Almost worth getting my pants pulled down for. Mr. Pants Puller Downer had to jog three laps around the gym with HIS pants around his ankles while the rest of the class sat in the bleachers.

I think the punishment fit the crime. These days, she'd probably get fired. Which is sad, I think.

14 Leg Humps:

Lisa said...

beyoootiful justice. But you're right. These days, she'd be unemployed before she knew what hit her. I did the Jahari thing. I thought I picked good words for you, but obviously I didn't... lol

Phil said...

Nowadays, not only would the gym teacher get fired, she'd probably get arrested on some kind of sex charge.

And yes, we Californians are an easy bunch to make fun of. But, since Tahoe is several hours inland, I think you'll still classify as a technical West Coast virgin. :)

Echoes in a Nomad's Head

junebee said...

Heh, heh, did he have underwear on or just a jock strap?

Have a good time in CA. Looking forward to reading about it.

justdawn said... I don't care WHO you are...THAT'S funny:)

And have a fantastic time in Cali...NoCal is BEAUTIFUL!

Killired said...

that's hysterical! the teacher would get sued these days for doing stuff like that! good story... i found you on barb's blog.. you left her a comment so i decided to come check you out... funny stuff here!

Spider Walk said...

I have had the Jahari up on my blog for a few days too. It's interesting to see what people think about vs. what you think of yourself isn't it?

My hubbie will be leaving Tahoe just as you arrive! He comes home the last day in March. He's there for conferences too. Smallworld eh?

I love your story...lmao! I bet your whole class was just cracking up to watch him jog around the gym!!

Storm said...

Oh, that kid totally deserved it. I wonder if he learned his lesson?

RisibleGirl said...

I did the Johari thing. I wanted to pick WAY more adjectives. meh.

Oh, and thanks for the nice compliments. That means a lot from my favorite blogger. SERIOUSLY!

Crazy Lady said...

He so got what he deserved!

Gary said...

Do you realize how sad it is that that poor fellow now has to face life being known as Mr.Pants Puller Downer?

Vulgar Wizard said...

Oh, sweet! I bet that kid has issues everytime he has to use the restroom and his pants are around his ankles.
I miss "the good old days" when you could "paddle" a child and not go to jail for it. It's to the point here that you can't even request that the teachers discipline your child with a whipping because you too could go to jail for child abuse. I'm so not looking forward to going through this stuff. It's only going to get worse as the years progress.

I put up a Jahari window on my site a few days ago. So far, no one's participated in the activity of judging me. I think I should be worried now because no one thinks anything of me....

Samantha said...

That kid totally got what he deserved! It really is sad that she would have been charged with some sex crime for it now. California recently repealed the "spanking" ban, and said that you can spank your child as long as there is no physical evidence of it 10 (or 15?) minutes later. I can live with that.

I put up a Jahari window last week too. I think it's really neat.

Debi said...

yes cali is going to provide you with plenty to mock. I do it every day....but untill you actually see the ocean...yer still a virgin. :)

Anonymous said...

That's great he got what he deserved, I had my shorts pulled down, only I didn't have anything on under it and even worse I just got done swimming, so there wasent much to see but the laughs never stopped, I could have used a teacher like that.


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