Thursday, February 16, 2006

Waht Teh Fcuk?

I've seen 'teh' all over the blogverse. What in the HELL does it mean? I've been wanting to ask you all for AGES, but I kept forgetting.

You know what I think is really fucking stupid? When people have full length mirrors in front of the toilet. I mean seriously. There are some things NO ONE should see you doing. Not even YOURSELF. You know? Because that face? Um, my friend, please take the full length mirror off of your bathroom door because I've gone and embarrassed myself and now I can't stop making fun of ME! Ahem.

If I were to participate in the Bitch Olympics, if there were indeed a Bitch Olympics, I would get a Gold Medal in Eyerolling. FOR SURE! You all have got NOTHING on me in that department. Well, maybe you do. I don't know. But this is MY blog wherein I am the eyerolling QUEEN! Go brag about YOUR eyerolling greatness on your own damn blog. Sheesh.

Anyway, I have a notion that I would not even PLACE in the Conveying a Cavalier Attitude While Being Handed Your Tampon by the Sweet Teenage Boy Nice Enough to Help You Pick Up the Contents of Your Spilled Purse event. It's just a notion, really, unless someone out there actually believes that, "PFFFFFFFFBT! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! HOW EMBARRASSING!" could be surmised as a cavalier response. I think that instead of laughing and laughing at the look on his face when he realized what he was handing me, I maybe should've just taken it from him, and saved him some face. That probably would have been the nice thing to do.

Zube Boy was fussy yesterday because I bought Chip Mates instead of Cookie Crisps. He thinks I think he's only worth generic brands of cereal. I pulled some rule out of my ass because I'm a wife, and that's what I do best. It was something like, generic brands of cereal are better than their counterparts when eaten in the bathtub. And since that's where most of his cereal consumption happens, I thought that's what he'd prefer.

17 Leg Humps:

junebee said...

Well, if you wouldn't go around dumping your purse in front of teenage boys, you would probably HAVE enough money to buy the name-brand cereal Zubeboy deserves. These guys are probably taking your cash with one hand while handing your tampons over with the other.

Phil said...

He was probably embarrassed because you actually caught him before he could pocket the tampons. Everyone knows that teenage boys are perverts like that. Okay, I really shouldn't make fun of him, since he apparently was being a nice kid by helping an old lady who spilled her purse.

Here's how to handle Zubeboy . . . buy a box of Cookie Crisps. Then, when it's empty, save the box. From then on out, buy the Chip Mates and transfer the contents into the Cookie Crisps box. He'll never know the difference.

Phil
Echoes in a Nomad's Head

Happy Villain said...

I agree on the mirrors thing. I stayed in a motel in Windsor, ON on my way back from Toronto and the room had a mirror on the headboard, a mirror on the footboard, a mirror on the ceiling and NO mirror over the bathroom sink. When I took a shower I realized that the bathroom mirror was down on the floor, opposite the tub, so people could watch themselves bathe. I slept fully dressed that night and on TOP of the covers. Creepy.

Oh, and I have this image: white ceramic bowl of cereal, with the contents getting soggy and the milk getting dingy, being held in the hand of a grown man, sitting in his own white ceramic bowl (tub), getting soggy and the water getting dingy, as he eats his cereal. It's almost art. Weird.

lysie6211 said...

Phil's got something there....

I don't know...I'm pretty damn good at the eyerolling thing.

Khali said...

Everything you ever wanted to know about teh... ;)

and I am so there with you about the mirror thing.. *shudders*

Ginamonster said...

Good god, just use "the".

Zube, you would totally beat me in eye rolling because when I get too rolly, my lenses fall out. I think loose lenses are a disqualifier.

Crazy Lady said...

If I ever use teh it is just because I am a crappy speller. Consider yourselves warned!

Rori said...

Dude. Teh is the L337 word to use when you want to emphasize something.

For example, Constantine Maroulis is teh sex.

Or George Bush is teh suck.

L337 = Hax0r term.

Am I scaring you yet?

O.o

kyknoord said...

Still eating cereal in the tub? He's lucky you don't feed him sea monkeys.

Alaskan_Chilli said...

Damn! I go and get all excited because, for once I knew the answer to something only to find myself beaten by the fine folks above on the 'teh' department.
Too slow heh

Debi said...

teh=the? I dunno...stoopid typo people....he eats cookie crisp in the tub? I eat those sitting in front of the TV naked...but ya know that's just me.

Bonanza Jellybean said...

The cereal trick Phil recommended WORKS. Trust me. They do catch on after a while that the box is getting prtty haggard looking and never seems to empty, but by then they've eaten pounds of the store brand stuff.

And "teh" is what happens when the fucking cat jumps on the keyboard while you're typing.
nkfgfhdgfck,bvbhsdxgfxvhcxbjvteh

See?!?

angel said...

hellooooooo! this is the once in a blue moon that i get to comment! gotto agree on the mirror thing doll- too weird! when are you going to post a video of the eye rolling then?
love your work!

PaintingChef said...

Tell Zube Boy that he's being a tool and he's lucky you buy him cereal at all...

Or you know...whatever...

GeminiWisdom said...

All I have to say is...I LOVE YOUR BLOG. I look forward to reading your stuff and now I know where to come to get a good laff.

Erika said...

Mirrors in front of the toilet. Hmmm...In any event, it keeps a person humble.

RisibleGirl said...

One of my homophoebic friends told me that he likes it when there's a mirror in front of you in the mens room.

"it keeps people from sneaking up on you and attacking you from behind".

Yeah- OK.

Frankly, I'd kind of enjoy that if hubby did that to me. But then again, I don't stand up when I pee.

Nevermind.

(gawd I've missed your blog in my 'no internet access' days of late)

 

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