Monday, November 21, 2005

Folic Acid and Damn, I Love Him

Apparently, I'm fine having coffee for two hours and planning a friend's baby shower, but walking by this:

yesterday made me cry. Not the ibuprofen, and not even the women's vitamins really. But the fucking folic acid supplement. Because they mean MAKING BABIES. And then losing them and shit. The doctor said we could start trying again in December. And the thing is, I'm scared out of my wits. Eh well.

On another note, do you think Snickers are an appropriate Thanksgiving dessert? I'm hosting dinner at my house, and I LOVE making turkey and potatoes and all of that other crap, but I'm so not a baker. I could even put them in a pie tray or something.

Don't forget to hump Kyknoord's leg today! He's THAT cool. Just click on the little thumbnail over there------------------->

Last night Zube Boy and I were at the bar, and I had a moment. You know, one of those moments where nothing special is going on, but you're just so overcome with love you almost lose your breath. They're indescribable, otherwise I'd probably go on and on about it right now. Lucky you. Heh.

Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you, ALL of my pants have SHRUNK! It's kind of fucked up. I have a theory, but Zube Boy thinks I'm crazy. I think there is a clan of little gnomes that have set up camp in the tire pile behind our house and when we're gone they sneak in with their Shrinking Ray Guns and go through my drawers. Little fuckers. And to think I used to like gnomes.

24 Leg Humps:

Black Eyed Gurl said...

You should get one of your guests to bring the pie. Alternately Bakers Square or Perkins or any place like those usually sell Pumpkin Pies that you can pretend you made yourself. It saves you the trouble ('specially if you hate to or suck at baking).
Don't fret too much about the baby thing. In the 70's my parents tried for 3 years to have me, the month they gave up trying, I was conceived, and let's face it, I rule. It'll happen when it's time. 'Til then just remember, you get better looking every day!

Phil said...

1. It's perfectly okay to cry. And the best time to cry is whenever it hits you. Trying to force a cry when you're not feeling like it is, well, silly. So if you don't feel like crying at a baby shower & shit, but do feel like crying at the site of folic acid, then just make sure your tears don't get in the folic acid . . . I hear water & acid can go boom. And that would probably make you cry even more and for different reasons. But regardless, go ahead and cry, relieve some anxiety/stress, and make ZubeBoy take some massage lessons so he can help you relax before practicing the making babies part.

2. Like Black Eyed Gurl suggested, have one of the guests bring a dessert. Or, put together a home-made (but not baked) non-traditional dessert . . . caramel apple cereal squares, fondue, chocolate almond mousse, gingered blueberry yogurt, Irish trifle cups (my personal favorite), mock white chocolate mousse w/raspberries, or if you really want that pumpkin pie flavor make some pumpkin mallow pudding. Okay, I totally need to stop now, cuz I'm getting hungry.

3. Did it ever occur to you that maybe ZubeBoy did a little laundry and washed all your pants in hot water, thus shrinking them? The bastard.


Phil said...

Oh, I forgot . . .

2.5. No, I don't know that feeling. I live a lonely, pathetic life. Thanks for reminding me of that.



Samantha said...

I'm trying a new dessert this year that even I can't screw up, maybe it'll help! I'm just taking a bunch of Rollo's, putting an almond on top of them, and melting them in the oven on a cookie sheet. Seperate and serve! Hey, it's not pie, but at least it'll be edible, and really tasty!

My pants keep shrinking too, dammit. I'm gonna set traps tonight to catch the gnomes. When I get one, I'll send you a picture to show Zube Boy.

Zube said...

Black eyed gurl- You rule, too! Awesome. Thank you for saying that. I know it'll all work out how it's meant to, it's just hard in the meantime.


1. You are so right. Thanks.

2. I just talked to a friend who's going to bring some pie! Yay!

3. That little shit. I bet that's what it is!

2.5- Sorry. ;-)

Samantha- When you get that picture you HAVE to send it to me! That'll show him. :-)

Ginamonster said...

clothes shrinking gnomes? Thank god. I was wondering what that was rustling around in the oleanders outside my bedroom every night. that explains why my clothes don't fit. thank you Zubegirl!

Anonymous said...

It's alright to cry....look at it this way, at least we know your hormones are working and that's good!! The dessert thing, sweetie, I've got a pie you use snickers in and it's easy...if ya want it, I'll email it to ya! And the shrinking pants, yeah those lil' fuckers are everywhere huh?!?!?

Chickie said...

It's not gnomes shrinking your clothes; it is gremlins. They are much meaner than gnomes. I caught one shrinking my pants and he almost chewed my little finger off before I let go of him.

Anonymous said...

Snickers for dessert is perfectly appropriate.

My husband swears the dryer shrinks his pants. I'm not going to tell you what I answer with... :)

And cry if you like- you earned it. Sooner or later, all those hormones will kick in and you'll cry for no reason at all, so folic acid will hardly seem silly.

Jess said...

Definately gremlins, or a band of trolls. Gnomes arent mean enough.

PaintingChef said...

Those moments make everything else fade away, even if only for a few moments.

And I like to keep telling myself that I will birth such a kickass kid that the tears and the heartache will be worth it. No idea if it'll be true or not but some days, I think its the only thing that keeps me from dying a little inside. So what I'm saying is that I understand.

Zube said...

Ginamonster- Now, if only I could figure out how Zube Boy's pants are getting bigger. He says it's because I don't cook for him. I think he's fully of shit.

TXSM- Actually, that sounds like a cool recipe. Mind sending it my way?

Chickie- You know, you might be right about the gremlins. Gnomes are just so fucking cute!

Bonanza- Oh, I can't wait until I'm crying over nothing! And I'm afraid to ask what your response is.

Jess- I'm going to have to put on my spy outfit and check it out tonight.

PaintingChef- You are so right about the kickass kid. Our kids are going to ROCK!

Doggie Extraordinaire's Mom said...

When I was on vacation and we were hiking all the time, my clothes all grew and they didn't fit. But back from vacation for a month and they're all small on me. Those damn gremlins do the most vile things to our wardrobe. I think they're probably to blame for the sock shenanigans. You know? How one sock will completely disappear or even when you wash the pair together, one turns a different color. Damn gremlins.

You are so sweet. Crying over folic acid is totally appropriate. And how much you love your husband is inspiring. I get that same goofy feeling when my dog looks up at me with big eyes full of adoration. Or, when I'm eating something he desperately wants. Whatever. Oh, and sometimes I feel that way about my boyfriend. You know... if he's eating something I desperately want. ;)

Kjersten said...

I've made a snickers pie before. seriously. and it was from a real recipe book... that automatically makes it thanksgiving-approved.

Buy a pre-made chocolate pie crust.
Chop up candy bars into little chunks.
Mix up a bunch of vanilla ice cream until is soft and add the candy pieces.
Pour into the pie shell and level off.
Decorate with chocolate syrup and caramel sauce.

The end.

Amy said...

I'm so sorry! I know how you feel. I remember when we were trying to get pregnant with Maggie (it took 5 years) and every time I saw something pregnancy related I was either royally pissed or overwhelmed by tears. The company picnic after the giant company baby boom was nearly unbearable. *hugs* *hugs*

Butterfinger Pie is a tradition in our house. 1 premade Graham cracker crust, vanilla ice cream (2 pints), and about 6-8 butterfinger bars.

Take the Butterfinger bars and smash the living shit out of them (that's the best part! Total stress relief!) then mix 3/4 of them into the softened ice cream, put ice cream and butterfinger mixture into graham cracker crust and top with the remaining crushed butterfingers. Voila`
pretty and the perfect color for the holiday! Not to mention - it's incredibly yummy!

Amy said...

Oops... ooops... I forgot to mention - stick it in the freezer and let it firm up before serving. Geez... I'm brain dead... and just think I have to make one of these tomorrow! LOL

Jen said...

The idea of having babies still scares the shit out of me. Good luck to you though.

junebee said...

Glad you got the pie situation covered.

We're all out here rooting for you to get knocked up :) My step-sister's been trying too. She miscarried in March. She was real upset this month because the baby would have been born around this time. I'm rooting for both of you.

lysie6211 said...

Hang in there Zube girl. It's ok to cry. I told my friend I work with who lost her son last February the same thing. She was talking about how expensive those new Xbox's were and she stopped and I was finshed her sentence "Randy would of wanted one right? " I told it's ok to say that. So it's ok for you to cry. *hugs*

I've made the Snicker pie that Kjersten suggested and it's super easy and delish!!

Anonymous said...

A good friend of mine and his wife have been trying to fall pregnant for the better part of 6 years. After 3 miscariages I am happy to report that she gave birth to a healty, bouncy boy no more than a week ago.

So don't give up Zube... It is vital to the collective sanity of mankind that a sense of humour such as yours plays Marco Polo in the deep end of the gene pool for as many generations as possible.

justdawn said...

The gnomes shrink pants and steal socks out of the dryer. Fucking gnomes...

And on a more serious note...I had a miscarraige at 13 weeks in between kids 1 and 2. I was horrified when I found out just 3 months later that I was pregnant again...but everything went off without a hitch. Sometimes these things just *happen*...and while losing my angel baby was the hardest thing EVER...I can not imagine my life without Abby. You will have a healthy and happy Zube Baby...I just know it:)

Jess said...

K... I have to comment here.

Hon it is OKAY to cry. Do so and let it all out. I do not know how it feels, I can not begin to say that I understand because that would be very unfair. I do know though that a cousin of mine has 3 kids and scattered in there before and in between those pregnancies she had 4 miscarriages. It is painful to go through but there is hope. I have a friend she just had her third baby and shes also had a few miscarriages. NO one knows why these things happen but they do.

Keep the faith, and keep trying... Even if it does get hard. YOu will have your baby! I just know it! :o)

Ginamonster said...

Hey guys, the socks are at my house. stop by and I'll give them to you. (honestly, I really don't know how I have ended up with so many socks!!)

Julie Marsh said...

Sniff. That's awesome.

Pant-shrinkers? Did you send those fucking gnomes to my house too?


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