Sunday, December 25, 2005

You Know the Drill

I think that if Zube Boy ever comes home and catches me chasing the cats out of the bathroom with his drill, I'll probably be out of the running for Wife of the Year. Not that he'd be worried about the cats' welfare or anything like that. More because you just don't mess with a man's drill. That's, like, rule #5621 in the marriage handbook. Don't fuck with his tools.

Actually, I don't think I'll have to worry about him nominating me for Wife of the Year. A Wife of the Year is probably well versed in the function of all the dials on the washing machine. Not just Cold and Regular Wash. And she probably separates colors, too.

My favorite Christmas picture:

Though it's possible it might give me nightmares. I usually feel safer with Zack sleeping next to my side of the bed. I think he's an excellent Boogey Man attack dog and he protects the top of my head from being touched by beings from another dimension. I just hope he doesn't turn his Kujo-ass on me!

Note to self: Zack doesn't like so much when you tie Christmas bows around his mouth all muzzle style.

15 Leg Humps:

Miss Ann Thrope said...

I have to share.

My husband got really pissed at the cat one night because she would stop scratching mirrors, slamming cabinet doors and otherwise being a pain at 2am.

After listening to her do this for an hour, he got out of bed, wearing only white socks with red stripes (it was winter) and chased the cat down the hall with a riding crop.

Do not ask about the riding crop. Just get this visual and think of me laughing til I pee'd.

And he still gets husband of the year, so you might still be ok if you choose to whip out the drill.

Oh and do not tell him I actually wrote this down.

Jen said...

I am out of the running for Wife of the Year as well because I pissed and moaned about having to write a stupid Christmas newsletter to make his family happy.

The drill thing isn't so bad. He should be proud you know how to operate it, right?

Anduin said...

I think you should get wife of the year because you have a wicked sense of humor and is an important and necessary tool for any wife to possess. How else could you put up with Zube Boy's manliness?

You win in my book.

Barbara said...

Use a spray bottle or squirt gun on the cats - they are very effective. Merry Christmas!

mothergoosemouse said...

Never thought of using a drill. My foot worked just fine.

I love these dog pseudo-torture pictures. Zack is such a good sport.

lysie6211 said...

That is a cool picture. And yeah don't touch men's power tools. My daddy bought me a drill one year for Xmas. I ran around the house with it all day. (This was about 2 years ago)

Spider Walk said...

Merry Christmas Zube Girl!

I love the pic of Zack...wayyy too funny :)

Storm said...

Merry Christmas from me and Steve!

Crazy.Spoiled.bLitch. said...

Great picture! I have spent the whole month (I do this every year) trying to make my dog understand this tree is INSIDE not OUTSIDE!!! And Moopie loves the bows and wrapping paper, loves shredding them! Hope you had a great Holiday!

Zube Girl said...

Miss Ann Thrope- HA! That is too funny. A riding crop, eh? :-) Hee.

Jen- Who the hell wants to be wife of the year anyway? :-)

Anduin- Thanks Anduin! And, he would have to get husband of the year for making me laugh, and putting up with my neurosis!

Barbara- I'm thinking of getting a water gun. One of those big Super Soaker ones.

Mother Goosemouse- Zack is a TREMENDOUSLY good sport!

Lysie- It just makes me feel so powerful to use power tools. Even if I'm not using them properly.

Spiderwalk- Merry Christmas to you, too Spidewalk!

Storm- Thanks! And right back at you and Steve. :-)

Crazy.Spoiled.Bitch- I'm fortunate that the dog doesn't try to pee on the tree or anything. Now, if I were to let the fallen pine needles get out of hand, the cats would be another story.

Al said...

it's cool for you to use the drill for useful things like chasing the cat. Just don't leave it in the bathtub when you're done!

Happy Holidays Zube!

Zube Girl said...

Thanks Al! I hope you had a Happy Holiday, too!

junebee said...

I'm in charge of tools, power or otherwise at this house. The Citizen's likely to lop off his finger or something.

Gift ribbon makes excellent dog muzzles! I think there's an untapped market.

justdawn said...

ROFL...I love that dog!

Zube Girl said...

Junebee- They do. Multipurpose, those gift bows.

Justdawn- Heh. Me, too. Crazy canine.


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